So you have become a big timey business man and now carry a side bag with all your necessities. A nice leather bag mind you! People stare at you when you walk by, muttering to themselves at how they want to be you. The sun blazes on and the temperature rises thanks to global warming caused by one of the companies you funded but that’s alright, you made a cool 100 mill on the deal. You pull out the A5 water bottle; slim and compact yet filled to the brim. Panties and boxers drop in a 100 mile radius as you quench your thirst from this marvelous glass wonder bottle. Life is good!
Your mother (who is a nice woman) finally gave you the family recipe for her award winning pasta. Your dumbass however forgot to open a jar or two while you were cooking and now your hands are all slippery and stuff. What do? Super Jar Opener thingy to the rescue. Use it to grip the lid and open the jar like it was a candy wrapper. Very easy to use and may cause an existential crisis. But take a deep breath and finish that bottle of wine.
Every morning you wake up and feel like someone or something took a shit in your mouth and no matter how much you brush or rinse or drink water, it always ends up being the same. The problem isn’t you but the problem is you. See what you need is a mouth wash designed to kill the bacteria in your mouth without making it feel like someone took a leaf blower to it. Try it for a week morning and night and you will thank the Alpaca later.
Picture this, you are out with your friends and suddenly one of them complains about their glasses being too loose, no worries, you got this. You whip out your Wallet Ninja and use the screwdriver to tighten the screw. Your friends and you then enter a bar and order a round of beers, the fair bar maiden complains that they have lost the only bottle opener! Well motherfucker guess who is saving the day, you and your wallet ninja, you use the bottle opener and consume the cold elixirs. You then head out for some tacos and a sultry blonde comes running up to you and says she has lost her box cutter, no fucking worries, you whip out wallet ninja and use the box cutter to open the box. Sultry blonde invites you for “tea”
There seems to be either a weird fascination or obsession with lamps that are round and resemble a heavenly body (that means in space). The Saturn lamp is yet another addition to the ever growing list of these round balls of light. This one changes colors and has a dimmer function. Looks great no matter where you put it because at the end of the day its a cool looking lamp for cool people. If you dont own one, you are not cool and are single.
One of the hallmarks of summer is the need to consume hot dogs outdoors in your shorts with an excessive amount of condiments on top. There is absolutely no other way to do summer perfectly. You can grill em, fry em and now you can toast em. With this toaster, you can cook 2 hotdogs and the buns at the same time. Imagine all the time you will save, imagine what you could to with the extra 10 minutes you gained. You could rule the world, all the dads in the neighborhood would worship you, the Chads would pray to you every night. You will be legend!
Mildly annoy or excessively annoy (depends on their temperament) your vegan friends with these pillow cases. Pray to god they have a sense of humor or they will kill you in their sleep. Dont worry though, the glow on their skin will be seen from a million miles away like the beacons of Gondor, warning you of their arrival at night. Actually best you keep these and laugh yourself to sleep.
Tea aficionados, we have found the best tea infusers on the market. Get yourself these animal inspired tea infusers with adorable names. They are high quality, durable and easily washable. Who does not want an infuser that looks like a Sloth or a Narwhal. Multiple styles available. Collect them like Pokémon. Make sure to get a transparent cup for that extra effect.
Yup its happening mofos, Gameboy cases for your phone. While they have been around for a very long time, they are usually of subpar quality or lack the fidelity of the real thing. This case however is as close as you can get to the real thing. Has its own battery pack and built in speaker so you dont drain your phone battery. The best thing about this is that its not as thick as you would think, very ergonomic and very easy to use. Comes with 36 games and you can add more.
We all have that one friend who for some inexplicable reason was just really good at chemistry. They were the ones always reciting chemical equations or formulae (bet you didn’t know the plural of formula) and constantly attempting to mix one thing with another in the hopes of creating tiny explosions or bubbles. Either way they were always the weird but bubbly ones in the group and you loved them for it. Maybe you have fallen out of touch, maybe you still keep in touch but it would be a perfect time to send them a gift in the form of this spice rack with chemical formulas (bet you didn’t know this was correct too). Watch them explode (with joy) when they finally realize their friends still remember them. Light up their day.
Having an aquarium is one of the coolest things anyone can do. It instantly livens up the place, adds some life to a boring room and instantly increases your level of responsibility. Dont let the last one turn you off though, it is still an amazingly rewarding experience. Getting a full size one can be expensive and it can be a bit too much for a beginner, many start with something small, like this wall hanging aquarium that is perfect for small betta fish. Self sustaining with minimal attention needed, this aquarium will set you on a path to a hobby that will forever change your perspective on pets.
If you live in one of those apartments where your landlord does not allow pets then make sure to buy one of these so you can have something to at least look at when you are studying (lol) or are depressed. You an style it in different poses so you can pretend you are playing with an actual dog and it comes with a nice bright light in lieu of a face so you have a bonus right there. This is a no brainer.