Showing 1–12 of 19 results

  • Inferno Grill

    Inferno grill is what happens when you ask the Germans to make a backyard grill that will cook any meat to perfection in the shortest amount of time. It will make every other backyard grill look like a clunker. This is the Maybach of grills. Cook with sheer confidence. At this level you dont even need to spice your meats. They will spice themselves in this bad boi. 1500 degrees of sheer fucking heat harnessed for your pleasure.

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  • Mini Excavator

    When I was a little Alpaca, all I had to play with was a couple of marbles and some random stones I found. Its not that toys didn’t exist, its just that they were not exciting enough for me. I needed things to move the very earth beneath my feet, I wanted to hear the audible squeals of other children as they would tremble in the presence of my mighty excavator but sadly this did not exist when I was tiny. It does exist now and if you have children they might enjoy the power that a mini excavator brings. Made of steel and extremely durable and comes with track wheel with go anywhere capabilities. I think I can lose enough weight to fit on this, fuck I need this!!!!

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  • Monopoly Luxury Edition

    Monopoly Luxury Edition was created for the discerning few. The ones that dont understand the concept of a discount or a Black Friday sale. They believe that the price on the sticker is the price of the item. There is no such thing as a negotiation. An item has worth if it brings status. You have the LV bags, the Lamborghinis and the mansions but do you have this finely crafted, rich leather bound, intricately detailed monopoly board. No you dont is the answer. If you did then you would not be reading this. You would be buying one more for your summer home in the Hamptons (I’m not rich but I know rich people always go there). Please only click and buy if you can afford this. Do not waste the postings time.

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  • PlayStation Classic

    Ahhhh the PlayStation. Such fond memories of an era gone by. Things used to be simple back then. You would go out and get a game, pop it in and start playing. No updates, no internet, just you and the game. It was the one ounce of happiness that a lot of us had and shared with our friends and loved ones. Playing late into the night, snacks everywhere, absurdly difficult levels and that beautiful grey console chugging along. It never disappointed. It just kept going and it just got better and better. This one is for people who want to keep a piece of the past. You may no longer have the Daddy PS but you can have this reimagination with 20 built in games. Its cheap too! 

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  • Christopher Knight Home Rotating Coffee Table

    If you are still buying furniture from Ikea then I am proud of you but would still recommend a bit of variety in your life. Try something new, bit of an adventure so to speak. Start with this beautiful coffee table that rotates and shit. I mean its like something out of a movie where some rich dude impresses his nemesis with this table. Think about it. Total power move. Rotate this table and the nemesis is like “Fuck, dude has style” Easy win. Durable and stylish. Worth the investment. What else will you spend that money on anyways?

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  • A5 memobottle

    So you have become a big timey business man and now carry a side bag with all your necessities. A nice leather bag mind you! People stare at you when you walk by, muttering to themselves at how they want to be you. The sun blazes on and the temperature rises thanks to global warming caused by one of the companies you funded but that’s alright, you made a cool 100 mill on the deal. You pull out the A5 water bottle; slim and compact yet filled to the brim. Panties and boxers drop in a 100 mile radius as you quench your thirst from this marvelous glass wonder bottle. Life is good!

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  • Sumo Wrestler Sculpture End Table

    Sumo wrestlers are notoriously strong and huuuugeeee. So it only makes sense to have a replica sumo wrestler end table for your house. Project power and strength within your house and impress your guests with your eccentric purchases. They will never see it coming. Imaging having a party and a guest goes “my god man, is that a sumo wrestler end table?” and you take a deep puff from your pipe and reply “yes it is”. Power move!. Instant promotion. 

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  • Trailer Valet

    When it comes to reversing with a trailer, left is right and right is left (possibly). Your brain is not capable of processing this information and if it were, there would be no need for this product but its existence implies that your brain no worky. The remote controlled trailer valet will make short work of reversing and parking your trailer and you get to do it with a smartphone. Imagine all the hot mothers at the camping ground watching you park your trailer like their husbands down a beer. You will be the alpha at the trailer park!

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  • ASUS ROG Zephyrus Duo Gaming Laptop

    The problem with having a gamer laptop is that its difficult to have a second screen so you are limited to doing one thing at a time like some prehistoric caveperson (Papa Trudeau will be proud of me). The brilliant and possibly very high engineers at Asus have solved that problem by simply adding a second screen to a laptop, a feat many considered impossible. Now you can play your game and watch your favorite Twitch streamer scream in his mic on warzone about hacks and stuff. Maxed out specs and a slim chassis make this the ultimate portable gaming machine. Buy it, dont think, just do it!

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  • Traxxas 1/10 Scale Defender

    Buying a car is so expensive and then there is insurance, gas, repairs and it just adds to the cost and then your wife leaves you, such is life. You dont need a car! What you need is this Traxxas Defender. A 1/10 scale replica with some serious off road chops. Just look at the thing. Its like the real thing but smaller. Great for kids that are 20+. Will also save your marriage or accelerate (lol) the decline but at least you will have this sweet ride. 

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  • Geodesic Dome Igloo Thing

    If you are lucky enough to own a backyard or a space big enough for this igloo thing then it is a highly recommended product. Great for outdoor tea parties if you live in a rainy area (show mother nature you are not fucking around) or for your little crotch goblins to play in safely without being exposed to the elements. Have an outdoor slumber party for adults. Build your own tiny little nook in the backyard, a little escape from it all.

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  • Endgame Iron Man Gauntlet

    Experience the true power of the infinity gauntlet with out turning into a human glow stick. A highly detailed scale replica with 6 infinity stones pre installed. Snap those fingers and make your problems go away. There is a Thanos in all of us. 

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